I was asked about criticism in general and how I handle them.
I am no expert on it, but I certainly have gotten a lot of critique and I can honestly say, it has been a good catalyst to strengthen weaknesses. People generally will not tell you your shortcomings to your face. So whenever criticisms are dished out, I see and take it as an opportunity to better the situation. However, you must determine first if the criticism is from a gossipy place or from a genuine concern.
When our Kyokushin journey started I had very little "immunity" to critique in general. Unfounded gossips really corroded my heart. But over time I learned there is a place for criticism and good can emerge from it. I now say, "Don't come to me with your problems if you can't offer a solution".
Many bicker at each other but generally they offer nothing for which they are complaining about. Many has come to us with the same bad blood in them, which helps no one. So the first exercise I offer them to do is to think about the"why's" before they start speaking. "Why do I want to complain?" "Why am I speaking about this Branch chief?", "Why should I be the one to run a national tournament?". When you inquiry why you do things, and what motivates you to do them, it cuts the desire of "wanting" to do in half. Because the magic is knowing every intention and every motivation should come from a place of comfort, not fear.
The next step is, "Don't say it if you can't say it to their face". You gotta tell it like it is. We can have tact and diplomacy but honesty is the only way to really go forward. It can be brutal, there is nothing frilly about it, but that is just how it goes. I try to keep it short and simple and I say as a note for improvement. Nothing more, nothing less.
When one is on the receiving end of the critique, it can be hard to hear. But mentally train to see what is really is. First thing I ask myself is, does this person's opinion even matter? If it does, I will listen with the intent for a good change.
